Over Extended Codependency

Over Extended Codependency and It’s Consequences

For many, the psychological consequences of an over extended codependency period are the main cause of their current problems. In modern psychology the term codependency is broadly defined as ‘a psychological condition or a relationship in which a person is controlled or manipulated by another’ (Wikipedia). CogntivieOS Hypnosis views codependency as a natural instinctive drive present in all individuals during the first 12-14 years of life. This drive is installed by nature in the human mind to assure that the child is guided, aided and protected during early childhood. If this period is not completed and terminated it will produce dependency symptoms in adult life. 

Symptoms directly related to codependency in an adult mind include:

  • seeking external leadership

  • need of constant validation

  • needing to please

  • resentment for lack of leadership and support

  • chronic insecurity

  • self doubt

  • selfishness

  • feelings of inadequacy

  • feeling like an outsider

  • lack of identity

  • feeling like a fraud

  • feeling like a child in a world of adults

  • social anxiety 

Symptoms developed as a consequence of the above

  • antisocial tendencies

  • emotional numbness

  • dependency in relationships

  • anxiety

  • fears

  • panic attacks

  • chronic anger

  • depression

As a natural stage in human psychological development that occurs in childhood, codependency acts to keep children psychologically dependent upon their parents in order to facilitate teaching, guidance and safety while the child is physically and mentally vulnerable. The codependency period begins at birth and ideally continues until puberty, around the ages of twelve to fourteen years old. During the codependency period the developing mind of the child is dependent upon the parents for leadership, security, validation and guidance. Ideally, the parents will provide all of this as well as teach the child how to lead itself so that he may begin to exit the codependency period around eight years old. The full transition to complete self leadership should occur around puberty. Correct termination of the codependency period allows the young adult to become emotionally independent and equipped to lead and live an efficient and balanced life.

When the mind detects that the self-leading learning process has been completed codependency will be naturally terminated by the mind. The mind will not terminate codependency until it is unconsciously confident that sufficient self-leadership is in place. Codependency may remain active in some cases throughout all adult life.

An adult living with an unterminated codependency is like a child without a foundation of safety, guidance and validation. This creates an adult with excessive fears and emotional instability; one who will constantly seek leadership and validation from others. He may have anxiety and a lack of self confidence in social interactions with others. Consequently, he may feel unsafe in most environments that are not home. He may be resentful or angry for not being taken care of and in many cases he may feel like an outsider or a fraud when with his peers. Unterminated codependency may be the cause of some of the most current psychological syndromes such as social anxiety, agoraphobia, inferiority complex, borderline personality and  depressions.

CognitiveOS Hypnosis Theory of Depression

These feelings in an adult mind of being un-lead or unsafe will constantly challenge the survival system with false elements of ‘danger’. This overwhelms the brain causing, in severe cases, the condition known as depression. CognitiveOS Hypnosis describes depression as a condition produced by a brain that is overwhelmed by an overactive survival system. Using a computer metaphor to describe the mechanism of depression we can compare the brain to a computer and the mind to the software that controls that computer. Computers use CPUs to process data and the amount of data that can be processed at any given time is limited by the CPU’s capacity. If too much data is sent to the CPU, the software slows down or crashes.

Our brain’s capacity for daily data processing is quite large, but that capacity will be highly reduced if the brain constantly receives requests for priority processing from the survival system. The survival system is part of the mind’s ‘software’ which was installed by nature to keep us safe. It is there to help us detect and remember danger which allows us to prevent danger in the future. From the moment we are born the survival system creates a ‘database of the unsafe’. This database contains items such as thoughts, feelings, sensations, people, animals, objects, sounds, sights, or any combination of those items that through our mind’s perception of events has been associated with anything dangerous or unsafe. This list of items is constantly matched with daily data. If a match is found the survival system sends a priority request to the brain to analyze the threat and create a suitable response. This is commonly know as the fight or flight response.

Our brains release chemicals In order to alert and activate the body’s defense mechanisms. The chemicals create alertness, anxiety or fears which our minds believe to be warnings. Cortisol, the hormone connected with the ‘fight-or-flight’ response activates the mind-brain-body defense system in order to respond to a dangerous situation. This process is lifesaving if triggered by a genuine threat, however, it becomes overwhelming if it is constantly triggered by threats erroneously considered dangerous. Even just a few items falsely listed as unsafe and constantly present in our daily routines will continuously trigger the above-described defense mechanism. The brain will then go on to reward this reaction by producing dopamine thus creating a habit of the subject’s responses. This will cause a constant state of alertness, anxiety, fear or numbness. The ability to process simple daily data will be hampered by an overloaded brain. Energy will be continuously wasted by this repetition of false warnings resulting in the typical symptoms of depression.

An overactive defense response will challenge the mind with constant warnings that create anxiety, fear, hyper alertness and a continual feelings of being unsafe. An overwhelmed brain suffers from fatigue, lack of focus, procrastination and lack of stamina. This can lead to physical illness, learning and working disabilities, social awkwardness, lack of self-confidence, sadness, loneliness, isolation, procrastination and in some cases anger or resentment.

CognitiveOS Hypnosis

On the basis of extensive research and practice of over 20 years Luca Bosurgi created a modality of psychotherapy under hypnosis, called CognitiveOS Hypnosis. This modality is designed to permanently clear the unterminated codependency and most forms of depression, rehabilitating the affected individual into an efficient and successful life. 

The aim of CognitiveOS Hypnosis is to establish the client’s leadership over their mind and reset their survival system to be triggered only by real danger. This releases the brain from unnecessary, overwhelming and crippling work.

The five week CognitiveOS process has proven highly effective, permanently resolving numerous cases of unterminated codependency and depression.